sidemirrorshooting

They say I’m happy, but it’s a lie….

Even in photographs, there will be times where you will have to show real hatred, real contempt, real despair, real anger and real sadness.

This is no forced shoot, I took a shot of my tear lined face, my swollen eyes and a look that couldn’t be replicated unless you show the same heightened emotion.

This photograph was taken on a very painful day. I didn’t think I wanted anyone to see it, but I just want to share it to the people who read this so they’d know a little more about myself.

I am a troubled girl. Sometimes, I think too much for my own good (that’s why it’s already 1 in the morning and I’m still awake trying to post). Most of the time I am bubbly and bitchy, but there are times where I feel the weight of the world on my shoulders and the need to be quiet, angry and sad just gets me.

People don’t get it why I’m like that, and it’s difficult for me to open up. Or to explain why one day I’m so happy and the next day I’m looking up over dosage of valiums or any medication that would lead me to eternal slumber. (Paracetamol takes 4-18 days…I don’t think I can wait that long…)

I take beautiful photographs to escape the pain sometimes. And I write to create a sort of release. But no matter how I try to run away. I will always have this problem and I keep fighting it, and sometimes I win.

But recently, I keep losing.

Please help me…

Stumble it!